HP Chat1
by swim freak 9000
Summary: Well...I was bored. And I wondered what it would be like if some of the HP characters were in a chat room together. This is the result. Features and engagement, dead people, and random nicknames.


_A/N: Oh, the things boredom does to a person…_

**ChosenOne has entered chat room #354**

**Bookworm has entered chat room #354**

**Notasidekick has entered chat room #354**

**ChosenOne: **Hey guys! What's up?

**Bookworm: **Not much. I've just been working on an extra credit essay for Professor Flitwick.

**Notasidekick: **Mione, what is it with you and extra credit essays?

**Bookworm: **What do you mean? I just worry about my future.

**Notasidekick rolls his eyes**

**Bookworm: **Ron!

**ChosenOne: **no comment

**Bookworm: **Harry!

**Notasidekick: **Hermione!

**Darklord13 has entered chat room #354**

**FaithfulServent has entered chat room #354**

**Darklord13: **Now we can discuss evil things in private.

**FaithfulServant: **Yes, my lord.

**Darklord13: **I have a new plan to kill the Potter boy…

**FaithfulServant: **Please, my lord, continue.

**ChosenOne: **Yes, by all means, continue…

**ChosenOne: ** : (

**Darklord13: **Well, first we must kill off that mudblood girl and that sidekick of his, but that will be fairly easy.

**Notasidekick: **Hey! Watch it! I'm NOT a sidekick!

**Darklord13: **wait…are you the Weasley boy?

**Notasidekick: **duh

**Bookworm: **duh

**ChosenOne: **duh

**FaithfulServant: **duh

**FaithfulServant: **I mean, yes, my lord. It is the Weasley boy.

**Darklord13: **So that means that chosen one is Harry Potter!

**ChosenOne: **yep

**Darklord13: **I will kill you!

**Darklord13 kills Potter**

**ChosenOne: **…

**Redhead442 has entered chat room #354**

**Redhead442: **Hey everyone what's up?

**Notasidekick: **Hey Ginny.

**Bookworm: **Dark lord just killed the Chosen One

**Redhead442: **What? 

**Darklord13: **Muhahaha! : (

**Redhead442 cries**

**Darklord13: **That's right little girl. Cry.

**Notasidekick: **You made my sister cry!

**ChosenOne: **Ginny, it's okay. I'm not dead.

**Redhead442: **Really?

**ChosenOne: **Really really really.

**Redhead442: **YAY!

**Loopylunarlady has entered chat room #354**

**Loopylunarlady: **hello everyone

**Redhead442 hugs ChosenOne**

**ChosenOne is hugged…**

**Bookworm: **Hey Luna

**Notasidekick: **Hey Loony

**Notasidekick: **I mean Luna.

**Bookworm slaps Ron**

**Bookworm: **You're so mean!

**Notasidekick: **I know….

**Darklord13: **Hey! You're evil now? Do you want to be a death eater?

**Notasidekick: **No…

**ChosenOne: **lol

**Darklord13 kills the sidekick**

**Notasidekick is killed?**

**Bookworm: **Noooooo!!! Ron!

**Notasidekick has changed his/her nickname to Weasleyghost**

**Bookworm: **Ron!

**Bookworm: **sob

**Weasleyghost: **It's okay, Mione.

**Bookworm brings Ron back to life**

**Weasleyghost has changed his/her nickname to Ronnotdead**

**Bookworm: **YAY!

**Bookworm hugs Ron**

**Padfoot has entered chat room #354**

**Prongs has entered chat room #354**

**Moony has entered chat room #354**

**ChosenOne: **Sirius?

**Padfoot: **Yep.

**ChosenOne: **Dad?

**Prongs: **Yes Harry. How are you?

**ChosenOne: **Well, destroying evil and killing Voldemort haven't been very easy, but…this is so cool! How am I talking to you?

**Prongs: **They have computers in the afterlife.

**LillyBilly has entered chat room #354**

**LillyBilly: **Hello.

**ChosenOne: **Mum?

**LillyBilly: **Harry?

**ChosenOne: **Mum!

**LillyBilly: **Oh Harry! It's you! Look at how much you've grown.

**ChosenOne: **You can see me?

**LillyBilly: **I'm dead. I see everything.

**Prongs: **Hello there Lilly my love.

**Moony: **Has anyone seen/heard from Wormtail? He was supposed to be on here, we agreed…

**LillyBilly: **(sigh) hello James…

**LillyBilly: **no, haven't seen Wormtail.

**Ronnotdead: **So Harry, these are your parents?

**ChosenOne: **yes. Ron and Hermione, meet my mum and dad.

**LillyBilly: **hello there

**Prongs: **hi

**Bookworm: **It's nice to meet you.

**Ronnotdead: **hullo. What's it like being dead?

**Bookworm elbows Ron**

**Bookworm: **be nice!

**Ronnotdead: **XD

**Bookworm: **you're lucky I love you…

**Redhead442: **...

**Redhead442: **xD

**Bookworm: **as a friend!

**Padfoot: **rofl

**Ronnotdead: **It's not funny!

**Bookworm: **Stop laughing!

**ChosenOne: **lol

**Padfoot: **rofl

**Prongs: **lol XD

**LillyBilly: **James!

**Prongs: **what?

**Ronnotdead: **shut up!

**Darklord13: **muhahaha!

**Redhead442: **lol rofl

**Bookworm: **You're all so immature!

**Bookworm signoff (jerks!)**

**Ronnotdead: **Oh no…

**Ronnotdead signoff (um…)**

**Moony: **I've g2g guys, my potion is boiling and I need to add the unicorn hairs…

**Prongs: **bye Lupin

**Padfoot: **bye

**Moony signoff (TTYL)**

**Padfoot: **I've g2g too, although I don't really have an excuse besides that I'm bored…

**Prongs: **See you later

**LillyBilly: **bye

**ChosenOne: **Will you ask Dumbledore if he'll come on later? I want to talk to him.

**Padfoot: **sure

**ChosenOne: **thanks

**Padfoot: **no problem. Bye everyone!

**Padfoot signoff (boredom)**

**Prongs: **wait!

**Prongs: **never mind…

**Prongs: **I've got to go tell him something, I'll be back later. Bye Harry, Ron, and Hermione!

**Prongs signoff (bye all)**

**LillyBilly: **oh no…they aren't going back to the shrieking shack, are they?

**LillyBilly signoff (g2g spoil their fun…)**

**ChosenOne: **wait! Mum!

**ChosenOne: **…

**ChosenOne cries**

**Redhead442: **It's okay, Harry….

**Loopylunarlady: **I just remembered that I have to pack.

**Redhead442: **For what?

**Loopylunarlady: **My dad's taking me on a camping trip to search for horned rabid killer crumpled hornstacks! I'm so excited!

**Redhead442: **Great…well, have fun.

**ChosenOne: **yeah…

**Loopylunarlady signoff (packing)**

**ChosenOne: **Ginny, are we the only ones here now?

**Darklord13: **No.

**FaithfulServant: **What do you think?

**ChosenOne: **oh…

**ChosenOne: **could you two go now?

**Darklord13: **why?

**ChosenOne: **well, it's kind of weird to be chatting with my archenemy…

**Darklord13: **point taken. Come along wormtail…

**FaithfulServant: **Yes, my master.

**Darklord13 signoff (I'm off to plot world domination)**

**FaithfulServant signoff (my life sucks)**

**Redhead442: **creepy…

**Ron has entered chat room #354**

**MrsHWeasley has entered chat room #354**

**Ron: **I've got something to tell you….

**MrsHWeasley: **you'll never guess

**ChosenOne: **what is it?

**Ron: **I'll tell you as soon as everyone's here…

**Dentist1 has entered chat room #354**

**Dentist2 has entered chat room #354**

**MrsHWeasley: **hello mum and dad

**Dentist1: **hello sweetheart. You told us to come on here, do you need something?

**MrsHWeasley: **I'll tell you in a minute mum.

**Mugglelvr has entered chat room #354 **

**Ron: **hello dad…

**Weasleywitch has entered chat room #354**

**Ron: **hullo mum

**Weasleywitch: **out with it Ron. What did you want to tell us?

**Ron: **Mione? Can I tell them?

**MrsHWeasley: **Okay…

**Ron: **Hermione and I are getting married!

**MrsHWeasley: **Isn't it great?

**Dentist1: **…

**Dentist2: **Ronald Weasley why didn't you come talk to me before you proposed to my daughter?!?!

**Redhead422: **Congrats.

**ChosenOne: **Are you serious?

**Weasleywitch: **RONALD WEASLEY! You are dead! You told me that you're getting married in a CHAT ROOM?

**Mugglelvr: **Son, you are in trouble…

**Redhead422: **Umm..mum? Would now be a good time for me and Harry to announce that we got married a year ago and are expecting in six months?

**Weasleywitch: **GINNY WEASLEY YOU APPARATE OVER HERE THIS MINUTE YOUNG LADY!

**Redhead442: **I can't, the doctor says apparating could be bad for the baby. 

**ChosenOne: **Ginny!

**Redhead442: **Mum, I'm kidding. Harry and I are only dating on and off.

**ChosenOne: **…

**Mugglelvr: **She's fainted, so I'm going to go help her. But I'll be back Ron, so don't you dare get off!

**Weasleywitch signoff (fainted)**

**Mugglelvr signoff (what have I done to deserve this?)**

**Dentist1: **Well, when's the wedding?

**MrsHWeasley: **Mum, you aren't mad?

**Dentist1: **Well, although you did announce your engagement in a chat room of all places, I'm not mad if you really love him. Besides, better him than Krum.

**MrsHWeasley: **Mum!

**Dentist2: **(sigh) Ron, I'm still a little upset about this.

**Ron: **well, how about this: Mr. Granger, I am madly in love with your daughter and I would like to spend the rest of my life with her. May I marry Hermione?

**Dentist2: **I'm still mad, but…okay.

**Ron: **woot!

**Dentist2 signoff (I'm warning you…)**

**Dentist1 signoff (e-mail me the date of the wedding)**

**Lemonlover has entered chat room #354 **

**Catwoman has entered chat room #354**

**Swishandflick has entered chat room #354**

**Lemonlover: **Well, hello everyone.

**Catwoman: **Hello Albus.

**Swishandflick: **yes, hello.

**MrsHWeasley has changed his/her nickname to Bookworm**

**Bookworm: **Professor Dumbledore? Professor McGonagall? Professor Flitwick?

**Lemonlover: **yes, Hermione?

**Swishandflick: **Hermione, do you have that essay finished yet?

**Bookworm: **Yes sir.

**ChosenOne: **Um…are you having a teacher's meeting or something here?

**Catwoman: **We were going to, but you are here and we can't have one in front of our students.

**Bookworm: **Ron?

**Ron: **Yeah?

**Bookworm: **I'm going to go work on wedding plans and try to pick out a dress.

**Ron: **Okay sweetheart.

**Redhead442: **Mione, can I come to help pick out your wedding dress? Then you can help pick out mine… XD

**Bookworm: **sure

**Bookworm: **wait, what?

**ChosenOne: **Ginny…

**Redhead442: **nvm, jk

**Ron: **you'd better be…

**Bookworm: **Ginny, I'll meet you at the Three Broomsticks, okay?

**Redhead442: **okay, see you there in two minutes

**Bookworm signoff (wedding dress)**

**Redhead442 signoff (shopping time!)**

**PureBlood has entered chat room #354**

**garGoyle has entered chat room #354**

**daCrab has entered chat room #354**

**PureBlood: **Potty? Weasel? What are you doing here?

**ChosenOne: **It's an open chat, Malfoy

**PureBlood: **Where's that little mudblood friend of yours?

**daCrab: **yeah, where?

**garGoyle: **where?

**Ron: **My fiancé is out shopping for her wedding dress

**PureBlood: **You're marrying that mudblood Granger? Well, Weasley, you've done better than I would've expected…

**garGoyle signoff (hungry)**

**daCrab signoff (sleepy)**

**Lemonlover: **Draco, I would appreciate it if you would not use such a foul name in my presence.

**PureBlood: **And just who do you think you are?

**Catwoman: **That's professor Dumbledore.

**PureBlood: **My mistake, professor, I was only joking.

**Ron: **Oh no.

**ChosenOne: **What?

**Ron: **Hermione just called again to ask me if I think she's fat, whether yellow or pink looks better with her skin tone, and what type of mascara to buy.

**ChosenOne: **Are you sure about this marriage thing?

**Ron: **Absolutely.

**Ron: **I think…

**Mugglelvr has just entered chat room #354**

**Mugglelvr: **Ron, still here I see.

**Ron: **Yes…

**Mugglelvr: **well, I think it's about time you came over and had a "little talk" with me…

**Ron: **Yes sir. I'll be right over.

**Mugglelvr signoff (time to chat…)**

**Ron: **wish me luck harry

**ChosenOne: **luck

**Ron signoff (DOOM)**

**Darklord13 has entered chat room #354**

**ChosenOne: **hey.

**Lemonlover: **Why, hello there.

**Darklord13: **So, we meet again Mr. Potter.

**ChosenOne: **yep

**Darklord13: **Personally, I don't want to wait until July 29th or so to fight you, so I'll just meet you at the Leaky Cauldron in 10 minutes and we can fight.

**PureBlood: **fight fight fight fight!

**Lemonlover: **Draco…

**PureBlood: **sorry sir

**PureBlood signoff (I've g2g torture innocent muggles…)**

**Swishandflick signoff (no excuse)**

**Catwoman signoff (I need to prepare my NEWT) **

**Lemonlover: **Well, good luck Harry. May the best man win. If I can, I'll drop by later.

**ChosenOne: **Thanks sir

**Lemonlover signoff (need more lemon drops)**

**Darklord13 signoff (fight!)**

**ChosenOne signoff (this is so stupid…)**

_A/N: Yeah. Sorry the beginning sucked. And the middle sucked. And the ending sucked. I just wanted to wrap it up. REVIEW! My reviewers get not only a shiny sickle, but also world domination and a cookie. _


End file.
